Need to be inspired

I am having a bit of ‘writers block’, if I can call it that. I want to write, but not sure about what.

I took sometime out from blogging due to various reasons and now I am back feeling a little empty.

It partly may be due to the fact, I have been on 3 courses of antibiotics, which has zapped some of my creative juices 😁

I am at a weird point in my life…i have never been here before. I question a lot of things, some things I held sacred are losing their place.

On the spiritual journey it is good to question, as then only you can pierce through the veils to unravel the supposed truth, this I have read and heard from some wise people. But when events occur, sweeping away like a hurricane, some of the foundations of your beliefs and faith, it is hard to see the above purpose. It makes me actually angry. Then sad…Because I thought I had found some unchanging fundementals to build my faith and beliefs on.

Don’t be mistaken, I don’t need life to be pretty roses down the garden path or neatly gift wrapped with a pretty bow.

I have had my fair share of pain. I not only survived but my faith in the higher power or aka God and it’s spark in me brought me, much strength and joy.

But now sometimes I question this higher power, when life seems so random in its cause and effect. These life changing events I have witnessed lately is not even in my life but those close to me.

It has shaken me… Why? Because these events don’t fit the equation of cause and effect of what I can see on the physical plane.

I know there are many unknowns at play in this universe, that I may never become aware of.

So how to move on with life, assemble the fragments of pieces that is your beliefs, faith and life that lie around you. Firstly you move on because time waits for no one. Secondly because survival and hope are our two strong innate drivers as human beings.

But like many of you I thrive on meaning for most things. A purpose, a goal and examples of good defeating the bad; love, faith and hope overcoming all the obstacles thrown at it. Even when I was in my pain, these true stories inspired and motivated me to keep trying after many failures. Others happiness fuled my drive. But now around me, when I see pain, hardship and broken lives. At times it makes it hard for me to be positive or inspired.

All this has brought me to a conclusion, that my need to find meaning and things to make sense is the issue. So I won’t seek it. Life need not make sense, it need not be put in a neat little equation.

I can only live my life from where I am now, who I am and who I strive to be. On the way my beliefs may change and I will see life’s ugly face enough times, that sometimes hope for the better may look bleak.

But ultimately I like the version of me who has hope, faith and who is centered within more than the hopeless and disheartened one. Yes I will be latter once in awhile, wallow in anger, sadness and pity. But I cannot stay there too long.

Ultimately spirituality is about living a happier life for yourself and the effect of it spreading to others. I am no longer seeking “equanimity or detachment” as I used to. Nor the undefinable goal of ” liberation”, which I don’t think I ever did.

There are so many things in the world, that we are not in control of. But there are tools to dealing with it and how we react or respond to them.

Quotes time 😊

” Feel the feeling. Don’t become the emotion. Witness it. Allow it and Release it. ” Wachabuy. com

Key tool on this path I feel is your mind. It is the problem giver and the solver, how we manage it decides “Your World”. Because yes most of it is from your perception of things, people and situations around you.

Another quote 😊

” It all begins and ends in your mind. What you give power to has power over you, if you allow it ” Anonymous

So to sum it up “Live your life to be a good example of what you believe ” Robert D Hales. That’s all we can do…

The Inside My Head Tag


Apologies Richa for the delay… Work, life, holiday and getting sick has kept me away from my blog in the last few weeks 😕

This is going to be interesting… letting you see inside of my head OMG. 😉

Thank you Richa who writes iscriblr for tagging me, check out her website it’s a fun and informative. She is a very vibrant being.

Here goes:

  • How do I feel at the moment?
    Exhausted busy weekend with B-Day parties. One of it was for my little one. I baked & made a Princess cake for the 1st time for those who know me that’s major 😉. Answer as of 19/5.
  • What do I need more in my life?
    Time & undisturbed sleep for 7 hours each night 😁
  • What would make me happy right now?
    A holiday to an island paradise… Actually just went on one… Exactly what I needed but came back and got really sick. Erghh hate winter.
  • What is going right in my life?
    Many things and I am grateful.
  • What am I most grateful for? List 10 things.
  1. The higher power and it’s spark within me.
  2. My daughter – who is cause of my physical & mental tiredness but most importantly my Joy.
  3. My husband – He sees me in my full glory. Both good & bad, loves & accepts me for who I am.
  4. My family for their love and support.
  5. My handful of friends
  6. My health.
  7. My home and my beautiful backyard.
  8. Taking ownership of my life and faith that the impossible at times can be possible.
  9. Ability to give and share with those in need.
  10. My blog. It has given an expression to my thoughts and experiences. Being able to share it and with some cool people!
  • When did I experience joy this week?
    Seeing my daughter’s face when she saw the Cinderella B-Day cake I made her. As at 19/5
  • List a small victory/success?
    Finally starting this blog after few years of pondering on it.
  • What is bothering me & why?
    I wish at times I could get out of my head and be present more.
  • What are my priorities at the moment?
    My physical, mental and spiritual health.
  • What do I love about my self?
    I didn’t give up on life, love & joy.
  • Who means the world to me & why?
    My grateful list above. Why? Because each one is a piece of the puzzle, which makes my life. How they fit and come together gives it meaning.
  • If I could share one message with the world, what would it be? Be kind to yourself and as many others as you can. Please smile.
  • What advice would I give to my younger self?
    Your uniqueness is your strength. Don’t settle for what you’re expected to have or to be.
  • What lesson did I learn this week?
    Get out of your head and roll with punches.
  • If I had all the time in the world, what would I do first?
    Travel the world.
  • What’s draining my energy?
    To do lists!
  • What does my ideal morning look like?
    Sleeping in, cup of tea and brunch at our favorite cafe.
  • What makes me come alive?
    A good book, an inspirational quote or a life experience or real life story that holds wisdom.
  • What/who inspires me the most?
    Human kindness and love. Above, my blog.
  • Where does my pain originate?
    The atrocities and violations we as humans do to each other.
  • What are my strengths? Loyalty, loving, kindness, not letting what others think affect what I truely want.
  • What is something I’ve always wanted but too scared to get? Tattoo
  • What is something I would love to learn again ? Bharatha Natiyam – traditional South Indian dance. I used to be crazy about it when I was young.
  • Where would I want to live my ideal life?
    Right here… Not having to work 9 to 5. Having enough money to pursue writing and helping those in need. Winning the lottery would be useful.
  • Where would I like to travel in the next 5 years? Vietnam, Maldives, Egypt, Europe again different parts.
  • What can I do to take better care of myself? Exercise, being present and reduce the noise in my head at times.
  • What hobbies would I like to try?
    Yoga, writting and furniture makeover. Revamp old stuff into new home decor or furniture.
  • When have I done something that I thought I couldn’t do? Had a child.
  • At the end of my life, what do I want my legacy to be? That I made people feel that they mattered and that I cared.


Sorry no one, not because I don’t want to know what’s in the heads of some people but because my delayed response has broken the chain 😕

So let it end here…


1 Thank & tag the person that has tagged you
2 Attach the tag photo
3 Answers the ‘The Inside My Head Tag’ questions
4 Tag 10-20 friends.

Hope some of it was interesting to read 😊


These photos are from my first trip to South Island, New Zealand in 2009. The land of the lakes and mountains truely took my breath away… A breath taking liquid for this week’s photo challenge.

I love the lonely bench in the lake and the sky’s reflection on the water so clear, you could mistake it for the sky itself.

Yes I took photos of the prints from 2009😁….. Even now I like printing photos… There is something about the physicality of albums and smell of books that I cannot let go…



Is there a slight chance that we will one day see the oneness in all?

A slight chance the human race will evolve beyond the ego.

You and me though differentiated by name, gender, race and colour are not too unlike each other.

I bleed red so do you, my tears flow clear same as yours.

We feel from the heart and we reason with the mind.

You seek love and I seek to be valued.

We are driven by similar dreams and hopes.

Fundamentally it is about knowing we matter.

Since when was life a competition, filled with constant worry of missing out.

That we just want to accumulate all that money can buy, yet be so empty inside.

History was about the conquered lands and Empires built with riches from other lands.

Now it is greed and notoriety that divides.

Politicians and those with wealth continue to create and foster the divisions with fear.

Wars are created from this fear and people are displaced around the globe.

Didn’t they just want a normal life, with their family, just like you and me.

It all started because you thought I was different from you….Not better than you. The war of the egos began, yet to be settled.

Isn’t there a slight chance we can work together for a better world for the next generation.

Happy Mother’s Day

A day to be appreciated and to show appreciation for your mum…

On my birthday day which just went by, my mother spoke to me about the day I was born. She has told me about the day before but I didn’t realise she still thinks of that on my birthday.

She spoke of that day so vividly, I was surprised by her memory. Similarly she remembers the births of my siblings as well. She said, she always wakes up in the mornings of our birthdays and remembers our coming to this world. How beautiful is that…

It felt so nice to be so precious because that’s what my daughter is to me. It was so moving… Each birthday from now I will remember this.

So this year she wrote a memoir of it, so I can have it as a keepsake.

I am humbled and grateful for such Love… So hope all of you have a great Mother’s Day!!

Weekly photo challenge – The place where you belong

My place in the world is certainly not the hustle and bustle of city and neither is it suburbia. Where I feel connected to or belong is ironically two very opposite places. The Mountains and Beach…

This is probably why as you would have seen from my other posts, I love NZ…it has plenty of both…Pity it gets so cold there, otherwise I would love to move there.

So here are some more photos of the mountains and the beach, where my soul feels the most at peace

Being present…

When life becomes rapid, like a river, where moments pass not lived or at times not remembered. What do you do?

May be it’s part of motherhood and may be even age😊. Nowadays my memory is like a a sieve where some just filter through and some remain.

As a child I had a photographic memory of individual pages of my favorite books. This continued in my teens. Then in adulthood it changed, but my mind still captured and retained pretty much most information and life experiences, both useful and useless.

At times in life not remembering is not a bad thing. I have realised my mind, as if programmed innately, holds only snippets of the past, painful incidents. I am glad for it! think about it.. ..why would you want relive such incidents in detail.

Like many of you I feel time is flying too fast and I remember reading some where that the earth is rotation on its axis has fastened. No wonder the days roll over so rapidly that I can’t believe we are already reaching mid 2018. I still remember NYE 2017 like it was yesterday. So how to slow down and at the same time not let life happen without me?

I want to stop and smell the roses. I want memories ingrained with details of colours, smells and textures. Remember the feeling of the grass blades on my bare feet. And remember moments where my taste buds danced because I ate something wonderful for the first time. I want to be drawn into a cafe because of the smell of freshly brewed coffee and sit down,  consume it as I watched people walk past. I want these experiences regularly and not care of the life going past or worry of the ‘to do list growing’. Life is fast pace and we are on the move constantly to keep up with life.  Those of you who are parents will understand this more . We are driven by needs and wants of our children.

Mostly on holidays or rare weekends, when we are not tied to routine or chores that cannot be ignored, I feel  like I am present soaking life as it happens .

I know the answers, be more present and minimise the activities to the necessary and the enjoyable and meaningful.

But it’s hard being present when your head is trying to keep up with multitude aspects of day to day life and when I am present like I have been lately at work I forget, my personal life. I forget to message my husband,  somsomething I promised or leave  my phone unchecked and only see missed calls or messages from my family and friends  at the end of the day.

So basically I have lost the ability to multi task. Some say it’s good for your mind and increases the ability to be more present. But I am also playing catch up in different aspects in my life. So something always gives…..

But in the end I guess its about making an evaluation of whether you are ok, with what you miss out on or sacrifice to smell the roses…

Sometimes it’s not caring about the world which is centered on doing and achieving. But it’s about being present and absorbing the experience of being alive …




Bring forth the tide

Let your soul rise

The moment is now

Shine forth in all your bright

Don’t hold back your light

As it is your birthright

You were born to be here

So don’t shy away or wither

Be who you want to be

It need not be for the world

Or the likes in social media

Nor for success defined by fame or money

Let it be for that day when you look back


You know you did not just exist but you truly lived.